


Eddie and Touch

by Wackadaisicl



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Pennywise (IT), Asexual Character, Asexual Eddie Kaspbrak, Asexual Relationship, Asexual Richie Tozier, Asexuality, Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, Getting Together, Kissing, M/M, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Soft Richie Tozier, touch starved, touch starved eddie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:42:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29689695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wackadaisicl/pseuds/Wackadaisicl
Summary: Eddie Kasbrak just wants to be touched. Thinking that, at least worded in that way, made him feel sick. It sounded so gross, so… sexual. But it wasn’t. Not to him.~Richie’s thumb ran across his knuckles a few times before turning his hand over and tracing the lines on his palm. It was electrifying, sending shockwaves through his arm and right to his heart.“You’re touch starved?”
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 12
Kudos: 73





	Eddie and Touch

**Author's Note:**

> For those not up on asexual terminology:  
> Asexual- someone who doesn’t experience sexual attraction. Ace for short.  
> Allosexual- someone who /does/ experience sexual attraction. Allo for short.  
> Alloromantic- someone who experiences romantic attraction  
> Sex repulsed- finding sex and related things gross or uncomfortable  
> Ace ring- a black ring worn on the right, middle finger to signify your asexuality
> 
> Note: Asexual people can date allosexual people with proper communication, Eddie’s issue is that he’s extremely sex repulsed and Richie appears to be hyper sexual. Also, Richie’s ADHD is only implied and I’m sorry if I wrote it wrong. I’m not diagnosed with ADHD no matter how relatable ADHD Tik Toks are.
> 
> CW: There’s some references to sex but as a sex repulsed ace I kept it pretty watered down, mostly just talking /about/ sex repulsion and the word horny comes up like twice. There is no actual sexual content, just some cuddling and kissing.

Eddie Kasbrak just wants to be touched. Thinking that, at least worded in that way, made him feel sick. It sounded so gross, so… _sexual._ But it wasn’t. Not to him.

Eddie had long ago accepted the fact that he is so very extremely asexual. The sex repulsion wasn’t inherently linked to this, of course, but the identity provided a nice comfort. He wasn’t weird or broken and there was nothing wrong with him. He didn’t need to go to the doctor for this and he didn’t want to. Knowing he didn’t have to feel _that_ or do _that_ was extremely relieving. He wore his little ace pin Richie had given him after he came out on his backpack with pride.

Unfortunately, touch isn’t only sexual and being sex repulsed doesn’t stop him from being touch starved. Or from having a massive crush on his very allosexual best friend. Richie Tozier, the most allosexual allosexual to ever horny. Yeah, even if Richie liked him back there was no way that would end well. He knew there was no point pursuing a relationship with someone he could never satisfy so he settled for daydreaming what it would be like to be touched in the safety of his own brain.

Images of interlocked hands and circles gently rubbed into his knuckles, arms tight around his middle, legs tangled together, a palm to his cheek, all swarmed his mind leaving him warm and tingly. They didn’t help, only made things worse. The more he imagined, the more he wanted and this was something he just couldn’t have. 

Touch wasn’t something that came natural to him. He rarely ever initiated physical contact. There just never seemed to be a reason to, never a moment where it made sense to reach out and just _touch_ someone out of nowhere. When he did it felt unnatural and strained, like there was an invisible barrier between him and everyone else that he’d blatantly and wrongly pushed through. Whenever he was around other people, he was hyper aware of the distance between himself and them. He felt guilty whenever he accidentally breached that invisible barrier. 

People must notice since they tend to instinctively keep their distance, more so than with others around them. Especially the Losers. All of them are extremely physical with each other but when it comes to Eddie they make sure to tone it down, settling for gentle shoves or high fives or occasionally very brief hugs. He doesn’t know how to tell them that he’s okay with them touching him, that he _wants_ to be touched the way they touch each other. 

So he doesn’t. He keeps himself in his little bubble and resists leaning into their little touches that feel so much nicer than they should when they’re so simple and casual. Richie’s the only one who doesn’t make sure to leave a foot of space between them at all times but even he clearly holds himself back. Not that Eddie’s asking for a wet kiss smacked on his cheek like he’s seen Richie give the other Losers but a hug would be nice. A hug from behind, arms loosely wrapped around his stomach and chin resting on top of his head. God, he needs to stop imagining those kinds of things.

~.~

Eddie was struggling to concentrate on his assignment for history with the incessant sound of shuffling and tapping and humming coming from behind him. When Richie asked to be partners, he’d immediately turned him down. Unfortunately, he wasn’t nearly as immune to _Trashmouth Tozier Puppy Eyes™_ as he would like to act like he is and inevitably caved. Which led him to now, sitting at Richie’s desk freshly cleared of trash and old homework while Richie sat on his own bed, about as quiet as a construction site. There was a long, exaggerated groan and Eddie nearly snapped the pencil in his hands.

“I’m bored,” Richie whined, drawing out the ‘o’ in ‘bored’ like a toddler.

“Well maybe if you’d actually help you wouldn’t be.”

“Oh yeah, history homework is _definitely_ what I call a fun time,” Richie scoffed. Eddie didn’t reply, cherishing the moment of silence before it was broken with a sigh. “And I _will_ help! I didn’t ask you to be partners so you could do all the work, I just can’t _concentrate_ and it sucks!”

Eddie knew this, he did, and he didn’t hold it against Richie but they _really_ needed to work on this assignment. He heard the bed creak and soft footsteps, could feel Richie’s presence behind him and the chair move slightly as Richie leaned his weight on it. He didn’t look up but he knew Richie was moving to his knees beside the chair Eddie was sitting in. He felt bad for taking the only chair but it’s not like Richie would’ve stayed in it anyway. He was always up and down, taking breaks to just walk around when he needed to work. He said it helped him focus. Suddenly Richie’s chin was on Eddie’s shoulder and his breath hitched in his throat.

“What’cha got so far?” Richie asked, peering at the notes open on his desk.

Eddie couldn’t process the question, too distracted by the feeling of Richie’s jaw moving up and down as he talked and the warm breath on his cheek. He must have tensed since Richie quickly pulled away, muttering an apology.

“Uhm…” He tried to gather his thoughts, think of an answer or literally anything history related, but all that came to mind was Richie. If he was hyper aware of the distance between himself and Richie before, he didn’t know what this was. His entire side felt cold without Richie there.

“Eds?” 

He still hadn’t looked at Richie but he swore he could feel eyes burning into his skull. He shook his head as if it would clear his mind like an etch-a-sketch.

“Sorry, right, uh… the women’s suffrage movement!” _That!_ That’s what their project’s on!

Finally, he turned to look at Richie. He was looking back with concern, eyebrows furrowed and head tilted the way it always is when he’s thinking.

“Are you okay?” His voice was quiet and genuine, void of his usual playful lilt. No jokes, no teasing. _Fuck,_ he had no idea what that does to Eddie’s heart.

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine. Sorry.” Eddie retracted his gaze to anywhere except Richie. Unfortunately, he didn’t miss the way Richie’s throat moved when he swallowed.

“Was it…” He hesitated. Richie never hesitates. It’s what gets him in trouble all the time. “Was it the shoulder thing?”

“What? No, I told you I-” He felt pinned as he met Richie’s eyes. Those beautiful, warm, brown eyes that always make him want to melt and he couldn’t bring himself to lie. Richie’s his best friend. He can be kind of an asshole sometimes but he meant well. Eddie could endure the teasing if it meant Richie wouldn’t feel like he’d done something wrong when he hadn’t. He shut his still open mouth, exhaling the breath caught in his throat through his nose and breathing in again before restarting. “I’m just… maybe a bit touch starved. It was a shock, is all.”

That’s when he noticed the burning on his cheeks and neck. He’s blushing, as if this wasn’t already embarrassing enough. Who tells their best friend they’re touch starved? That’s so weird!

Before he could follow that spiral, Eddie was yanked back into reality by a weight on his hands. He hadn’t realized he was fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. Richie gently pulled his fingers apart, releasing the tight grip on the bottom of his shirt that would surely leave wrinkles. Richie’s thumb ran across his knuckles a few times before turning his hand over and tracing the lines on his palm. It was electrifying, sending shockwaves through his arm and right to his heart.

“You’re touch starved?” Richie asked in that same cautious tone.

“If you haven’t noticed, people don’t really touch me.” He knew that was kind of harsh but Eddie really didn’t know how to respond to sincerity when it came to Richie. He’d gotten their bickering down to a science but without any dumb jokes that didn’t even make sense half the time he had no clue what the right thing to say was.

“I always thought you didn’t _want_ to be touched.”

Yeah, everyone does.

“It just, doesn’t come… natural? To me, I guess.” It sounded more like a question but he really wasn’t sure how much to share.

Richie hummed, biting his bottom lip and Eddie really wanted to reach out and pull it free from under his front teeth’s sharp hold but that would be weird. So he didn’t. Suddenly, Richie’s moving, leaning back and pushing off the ground to stand up, still holding Eddie’s hands in his.

“C’mere.”

“What?” Eddie’s completely lost now. How did they get from women fighting for their right to vote to… whatever’s happening now?

“Just, come on” Richie pleaded, and how could Eddie say no when he sounded so vulnerable?

Eddie obliged, standing up and letting Richie pull him closer. He doesn’t realize what’s happening until Richie’s arms hesitantly wrap around his middle. It’s a hug. He awkwardly tucks his face into the crook of Richie’s neck and the arms tighten around him. 

“Is this okay?” Richie whispers into his hair and he nods. He didn’t realize Richie was tensed until his shoulders sag slightly. Eddie lets himself relax too.

They stay like that for a while, Richie humming while rubbing comforting circles into his back and Eddie absolutely melting at the feeling. He doesn’t know how long they’ve been like that exactly, he lost track of time, but long enough for his legs to start aching. Richie’s legs must be in a similar state as he slowly starts leaning back. Eddie already misses the contact but Richie doesn’t let go, instead pulling Eddie with him.

Oh, he’s trying to lead them to the bed. Eddie lets him.

They break apart for a moment as Richie crawls over his bed to the wall, leaving a space for Eddie. There’s barely a second of hesitation before Eddie joins him on the bed and Richie’s tangling their legs together, pulling Eddie to his chest. Once they’re all situated, Eddie sighs. This is _really_ nice. The humming stops and he’s about to ask why but he’s interrupted.

“Y’know, if you’re ever feeling like that you can always come to me. I know I’m probably not the one you wanna do this stuff with but-”

“Says who?” 

Shit, he didn’t mean to say that. Now Richie’s gonna ask-

“What?”

-and there’s no way he can answer without making everything awkward. Finally, he’s being held and by _Richie_ who’s being really nice and considerate like he always secretly has been deep down underneath all his stupid mom jokes that shows through in little ways and _fuck_!

Eddie doesn’t want to lose this yet. 

“Eddie? Hey, breathe. It’s okay, you’re okay.”

Eddie hides his face between the mattress and Richie’s chest as he slowly gains control of his breathing again. God, how many times is he going to embarrass himself today?

“Eds? Spagh-Edward? What’s wrong?”

And, because apparently he has no filter today, Eddie tells him.

“What was that? You’re a bit muffled, buddy.”

Fuck.

Eddie pulls himself away from Richie, ignoring the hurt look that flashes across his _friend’s_ face. It’s better to get up now than be pushed away after. Fuck, is he really doing this? Kinda too late now. He meets Richie’s eyes and quickly looks away, squeezing his eyes shut.

“I like you, Richie. More than I should. As more than a friend. I _know_ you don’t like me like that and that’s okay. We wouldn’t work, it’s fine. I _know!_ I don’t know why I can’t get over you but I can’t. I’ve tried, I really have, but you’re just so-” He cut himself off. That’s exactly where he shouldn’t go. “I’m sorry.”

Eddie turns to collect his stuff and leave but Richie grabs his arm before he can take even a step toward the desk.

“Why wouldn’t we work?” Richie’s voice is faint and lined with hurt.

“For fuck’s sake, Richie, I’m ace, you know that!” He didn’t know why it mattered. Why Richie would consider dating him even if he wasn’t ace.

“Well yeah, but you’re alloromantic aren’t you? I thought… that’s what you meant.” Richie looks absolutely bewildered and Eddie doesn’t know how he can miss the point so dramatically. He _knows_ Eddie’s sex repulsed, shouldn’t it be obvious?

“Yeah but that’s not the point. I can’t…” He didn’t know how to finish without making himself want to puke. He lamely settles on, “sex.” He hopes it makes the point. The word leaves a gross taste in his mouth. He hated being blunt about this topic.

Richie’s face morphed into that of realization and Eddie was glad he wouldn’t need to elaborate further.

“Eddie… you know I’m ace too, right?”

No, no he did not.

“What? Since when?”

Richie chuckled.

“Since always? I got the ace ring to prove it!” He held up his right hand, giving Eddie the bird. On his finger was a black band Eddie had previously only vaguely been aware of. “Where did you think I got the pin from?” He added, nodding his head towards Eddie’s backpack where said pin was displayed.

“I thought you got it to show your support?”

“Well yeah, but originally I got it for myself. For my jacket.” He was referencing a jean jacket covered in pins he’d collected over the past few years. “Then you came out and I thought… I thought it would show my support better than I could.”

That actually made sense but… no, it didn’t. If you were to ask Eddie who the horniest person he knew was, Richie would be the first person to come to mind.

“But what about all those jokes you make?” Eddie knew he shouldn’t question someone like this after they came out but he was just _so confused_.

“I don’t have to experience sexual attraction to like sex jokes, Eds. You can’t tell me I’m the first ace you’ve met who does that.” He was right, he wasn’t. “But uh, I think it started as a coping mechanism? Y’know, overcompensating or some shit but by time I found out what asexuality was that was just my humor. I’m not really sex repulsed so it didn’t bother me, I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable.”

It had for a long time. Richie’s dumb jokes were part of what helped him realize he was ace. But, over time he’d gotten used to them. And he’d never ask Richie to change.

“Not… as much as it used to. I’m sorry, I just assumed… that wasn’t cool of me.”

Richie gently tugged on his arm and he took the signal to sit down on the bed where Richie was now sitting up.

“So, we’re both ace. You’re sex repulsed and I just don’t care. Why wouldn’t we work?”

Richie’s eyes were full of hope and Eddie couldn’t help the smile that took over his face.

“No yeah, that’s pretty much it.” Richie grinned. “Does that mean… you like me too?”

Richie scoffed, pulling his hand away and rolling his eyes with his whole head.

“No Eddie Spaghetti, I just went through all that explaining so I could reject you more personally.” His voice was dripping with sarcasm but that didn’t stop the wave of dread that coursed through Eddie’s body. Richie noticed and dropped the act, taking Eddie’s hands back in his. “Of course I like you, Eddie. I have for… pretty much forever, actually. I thought that was just kinda known. I think you’re the only person who didn’t know, to be honest.”

Eddie laughed. He should feel stupid for not noticing so many things about his own best friend but instead he just felt overjoyed. Richie’s expression visibly softened as he laughed and he could see why he should’ve noticed before. That wasn’t very platonic adoration. Eddie really wanted to kiss him then. Out of habit, he started pushing that desire to the side but then he stopped himself. It’s about time he started asking for what he wants.

“Can I kiss you?” 

Richie grins, eyes darting down to Eddie’s lips.

“Yes please,” Richie exclaimed, already sounding breathless. 

Eddie giggled as he leaned toward Richie who excitedly met him halfway. Richie’s lips were chapped but warm and plush against his. The feeling sent a rush of warmth through his body, pooling in his stomach. The angle he was turned at was awkward and uncomfortable but he didn’t really care. Suddenly, Richie sucked Eddie’s bottom lip into his mouth, running his tongue across it. Eddie gasped, pulling away. The shock faded quickly and then he was moving, crawling over Richie so he was now straddling him. He cupped his face, and rejoined their lips.

In any other situation with anyone else, this position would send Eddie into a panic. But he wasn’t worried about this turning sexual and he knew if it did go too far Richie would be nothing but understanding. He felt hands grip his hips, pulling him impossibly closer and he moved his own into Richie’s hair. He’d always wanted to play with Richie’s hair. He was pleased to find the curls were indeed as soft as he’d imagined they’d be. He experimentally tugged as gentle as he could and Richie hummed his appreciation onto his lips.

The touching sent Eddie reeling. Going from practically no touch at all to _this_ was overwhelming and oh so addicting. It took every ounce of self control to not chase Richie’s lips when he suddenly pulled away.

“I can’t believe you didn’t know I’m ace. This whole time I thought we had a connection! Different suits but the same rank, and all that.” And there’s that familiar lilt again. Eddie would be lying if he said he hadn’t secretly missed it.

“You never said anything!” He definitely would have remembered if Richie had come out as ace.

“It was heavily implied.”

“How- you know what? I don’t care! Just kiss me, asshole.” He tried to connect their lips but Richie turned his head at the last second.

“Damn, Eddie Spaghetti getting _demanding_!” Richie exclaimed to his room and Eddie groaned.

“Shut up! And don’t call me that!”

Richie grinned mischievously as he grabbed the back of Eddie’s neck, pulling him closer and almost kissing him before stopping, their lips just grazing.

“Sorry Eds,” He whispered against Eddie’s lips, capturing them right as they opened to protest the nickname.

Eventually Eddie would remember their abandoned history project and convince Richie they really did need to work on it. He’d bitch and moan but as it would turn out, kisses are a nice incentive to keep him focused.

~.~

  
The Losers still don’t touch Eddie but they seem less careful about invading his space. Except Richie, of course, who rarely ever _isn’t_ touching him. He kind of likes that, Richie being the only one who touches him. Whether it’s holding hands or leaning against each other or feet wrapped together under a table, it’s like their special thing. A small connection that’s never broken no matter how much they argue. Proof that Richie’s teasing is wrapped in affection and when Eddie says “I hate you,” he really means the opposite.

**Author's Note:**

> When I first was inspired to write a fic with touch aversion and being touch starved I wanted to make it Stenbrough. I still think the awkwardness with touch the way I described it fits Stan better but then I really liked the idea of ace!Richie so I went with Reddie instead. I’m tempted to still write this with Stan for my Stenbrough fix but it would be /really/ similar up until the part where Richie comes in so idrk.
> 
> Anyway, I’m proud of this. It’s totally projecting but I think it’s still decent and in character. Well, besides the distinct lack of mom jokes but I wanted Richie to be soft for his favorite spaghetti man, sue me. I hope you enjoyed and as always, kudos and comments are extremely appreciated. I get more social interaction from AO3 comment sections than irl, which isn’t saying much.


End file.
